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4 September 2023

Exposed Magazine

Denzel Washington and Antoine Fuqua return with the third, and reportedly final, outing for Robert ‘The Equalizer’ McCall. Having been a fan of the original 1985-89 Edward Woodward show, my feelings about the cinematic interpretations have been mixed. Washington’s take on the role is entirely different from Edward Woodward’s retired British intelligence officer. For those unfamiliar, imagine an aged James Bond who’s decided to go private whilst retaining a flash car and luxurious pad. Woodward’s thespian acting style added a touch of real class to an otherwise routine action show. The absence of this interpretation was sorely felt in the films, by me at least.

The positive responses to The Equalizer 3 are quite baffling. Let’s be honest, the first two films weren’t that good. The first one was forty-five minutes too long with the most interesting character, played by Chloë Grace Moretz, largely absent. The second film, whilst shorter, has around four different plots, the main one only kicking in just after the halfway mark. The action in both is fine, but compared with John Wick, Nobody, or any Jason Statham film, neither is particularly special. Incredibly flawed albeit marginally entertaining vigilante flicks is the best one could objectively label them.

Admittedly, Southern Italy is far more appealing than Boston, and Fuqua convincingly shows McCall as a man whose equalising days are numbered. Washington’s performance gives quiet conviction to where the character now finds himself. Beyond that however, The Equalizer 3 is cripplingly dull. We’ve still got McCall doing that incredibly tiresome OCD thing with napkins and spoons, but there’s painfully little equalising that takes place. Although the gore might have been ramped up, there’s a certain weightlessness that plagues it. Ironically, it lacks any punch. Like the previous films, it’s only half-interested at best in its plot. At least before, the lack of story was compensated by frequent action. Here, Fuqua is content with prolonged sequences of McCall strolling about the Italian town whilst paper-thin baddies do the occasional nasty thing here and there. The antagonists here will make you nostalgic for the ludicrous up-to-no-gooders from the Taken sequels. The inclusion of Dakota Fanning is utterly wasted. Like Chloë Grace Moretz before her, Fanning is suddenly sidelined before getting the chance to do anything interesting.

The climax, which really should indulge in carnage, is painfully underwhelming. Not helped by the fact it’s shot mostly in the dark, entirely disregarding McCall’s established vulnerability. One feels Fuqua and Washington wanted the whole affair over and done with as soon as possible so they could get back to enjoying their Italian holiday. It’s a major decline in quality, without even the small pleasure of Henry Gregson-Williams’ score.

If you’re desperate for some real equalising, do yourself a favour and buy the boxset of the Edward Woodward original. If you’re looking for gorgeous footage of Italy, any Jet2 advert will do as good a job.


2/5