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1 January 1970

Exposed Magazine

The dust has well and truly settled on season 7 of everyone’s favourite blood and boob-fest, and the wait for the final outing is only getting more agonising by the day. To help tide you over, here’s who we think are going to lose the game by the time the dramatic climax is through.

 

Cersei Lannister

Let’s start with an easy one shall we? Mum of the year Cersei has made herself one of the most detestable people in Westeros following years of deceit and bloodshed. The last time we saw her, she was opting to pussy out of the battle between the dead and the living, a decision that will surely have consequences, even her brother/baby-daddy Jaime has walked away from her. Whilst there is a strong chance that her ex-lover will deliver the fatal blow, fans will be hoping Tyrion has the final say, after-all he’s already technically killed two family members. Why not make it a hattrick?

 

The Mountain

It feels like we’ve been waiting years for the Clegane brothers to finally go head-to-head, oh wait. After narrowly escaping death at the hands of Oberin Martell courtesy of some crazy Frankenstein shizz, The Mountain has been on borrowed time ever since. Defeating his brother would also round off the Hounds character arc nicely, perhaps allowing him to move on to happier life and put his past behind him. Other than, you know, what happened to his face.

 

Jorah Mormont

Even though he’s now Greyscale-free, I fear the future may be dull for Ser Jorah. The personification of the friend-zone has made no secret of the fact that he would give his life for Daenerys to protect her, ultimately, he may just have to keep his promise. Many have perished fighting for the Kaleesi, and losing her closest ally in the final season might just be the incentive she needs to defeat to Cersei and become the queen that Mormont knows she already is. At least he wouldn’t be getting pied off anymore. We salute you, Ser Jorah!

 

Euron Greyjoy

Although Euron has hardly won himself many fans amongst the people of Westeros – mainly due to the fact he’s an absolute wanker, you can’t deny, he is quite entertaining. Geoffry-esque, the death of Theon’s psychotic uncle will be more satisfying than it will be tear-jerking, and his joining of forces with Queen Cersei didn’t do his likeability any favours. In all honesty, euron dying is more important to Theons story than it to his own. Theon has been through the ringer over the course of the series, most notably being made into Ramsey Bolton’s personal slave and losing his little-lad (and I don’t mean son); if he’s going to fully bounce back from all the torture and phallic-troubles, he NEEDS to kill Euron.

 

Arya Stark

Ned’s favourite tomboy has done some pretty morally questionable things since the loss of her father, turning her into a cold-hearted killer. If everything goes to plan, season 8 should see the last few names get wiped from her list (most likely in a grizzly way), once this happens I don’t know if there’s anything else left for Arya’s character. There will most likely be plenty of free positions available in Jon’s army, but will she will be able to find any real purpose once the pain inflicted on the Stark family is avenged? I think she might become the final name on her own list.

 

Melisandre

The red woman’s prophecies have been slightly hot-and-miss to say the least, but one prediction that will surely come true is her death in this “strange land”. She has committed some horrible atrocities in the name of her Lord of Light, most notable the burning of Stannis’s daughter at the stake, whilst her father and mother looked on. Now it seems she’s backed loveable bastard Jon Snow as her winning horse, probably a smart call, but Jon isn’t exactly her biggest fan after he threatened to execute her should she turn up again. My prediction: After seeing Jon Snow succeed in his endeavours and fulfilling the vision, Melisandre excepts her fate and hands herself over to the King in the North.

 

Let’s be honest, as long as Tyrion makes it, all is well.